A joke or two

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Last seen: 11 years 9 months ago
A joke or two

Got an e-mail from a friend, found some pretty funny jokes in here, check em out.

-- A United States Marine and a Navy Sailor are in the bathroom taking a piss. The Marine goes to leave without washing up. So the Sailor says to him, "In the Navy, they teach us to wash our hands." Hearing this, the Marine turns and shoots back with, "In the Marines, they teach US not to piss on our hands!"

-- The LAPD, The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President gets tired of the bickering and decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.

The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist.

The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming.

The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear, who is yelling: "Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!

-- This is something I can appreciate. During our recruitment, they showed us countless videos and demonstrations on how to communicate silently. Of course we have our LASH Radios, but hand signals are essential for stealth. Here is a hilarious chart explaining some of the lesser known hand signals of SWAT officers everywhere. Enjoy! (The link to the site is below if you can't see the picture here.)

IMAGE(http://www.powdermonster.com/amusing/pics/swat_signals.jpg)
http://www.powdermonster.com/amusing/pics/swat_signals.jpg

IMAGE(http://miniprofile.xfire.com/bg/co/type/0/sjmerge.png)

Rand
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Last seen: 12 years 6 months ago

No link to the hand signals??
Nice joke tho I-m so happy

NO! I-m so happy

Not yet, if you can't see it or click a URL, neither can we.

only those who will IMAGE(http://miniprofile.xfire.com/bg/co/type/2/sasrand.png)

Merge
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Last seen: 11 years 9 months ago
signals

OK, now it's REALLY fixed, lol...

sorry, first post and everything, got the hang of it now i think...

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Spidey01
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Last seen: 3 months 6 days ago

Don't see it, but I remember this:)
IMAGE(http://img235.exs.cx/img235/613/militaryhandsignals0mi.th.jpg)

Good jokes, liked the CIA/FBI/LAPD one:)

The first one's old as dirt, but being a bit of a navy brate I don't stick with it;)